You Might Say My Bedside Manor is ... Lacking

It hit about a week ago. It got the baby first. Then the rest starting falling like flies. By Wednesday this plague upon my house had them all coughing and crouping, sneezing and dripping, whining and BITCHING. And yet, it has not hit me...

I have an iron lung appearently. And an immunity of super human proportions. Perhaps because I have drank my weight in cranberry/pomegranate green tea with honey over the last three days.

To be surrounded by the amount of CRAP that I am, and to hold out with only a slightly sore throat in the morning, I must be blessed ... OH and have the patiences of a SAINT.

I have 5 children ranging in ages from 2 - 32. It seems the oldest and the youngest are giving me the most problems. Monster has been HELL.ON.WHEELS since about Monday - throwing fits, throwing toys, and throwing her little weight around like she OWNS the place. Which is only different this week by the amount of GOO that is coming out of several of her orafices.

The MAN however ... is driving me out of my ever-loving mind. He, unfortunately, has something the rest of us don't.

He has the "Man-Cold". Which differs from the regular cold in that it is IMMENSLEY worse, requires constant attention, and is far more horrible than ANYTHING anyone else is going through at any given time. He came home the DAY I mentioned that the kids weren't feeling well and decided he was getting sick too.

Now I don't mean to say that I think ALL sickness is in your head, but I will say, that for the two of us, it seems to be. I decide that I am not getting sick. I can't. All you mothers know what I'm talkin about.

Can I get an AAAAAMEN?!

But HIM. He comes home and says 'MY LUNGS ... It's ATTACKING MY LUNGS" - which because of his fake stuffynose sounded like "BUY LUGZ" - I should have bought the Lugz. Considered it a reward for all the CRAP I would have to wade through over the next week. I attempted to banish him to the bedroom and get him out of my hair, and off my computer, but we can't find the remote so he has planted himself on my couch ... ahhhhh LOVE.

I REALLY AM TRYING FOLKS. I love him, and them, all very very much. But there is only so much snot wiping, med administering, cough hearing, whine ignoring, need answering that one woman can take.

Pray y'all. Not for me. For them. If they don't get over this soon, I will go insane and I will take them with me.